Action Packed

This is a hot song. I will find it one way or the other.



My trip to the south last week was interesting- Proof again that the human body has an amazing ability to function with out sleep. Moments after turning it on, my uber-expensive camera stopped functioning. This likely had something to do with the oil wrestling party i attended the weekend previous, though I can't be sure (insert vague references to topless wrestlers, broken noses, simulated acts of lesbian affection an good old fashioned BBQ) Life can't be all work.

So i had to fall back on the old camera phone. (The old camera phone stopped functioning as a phone several days later... I blame Key West)

Since it was the company's dime, I stayed in a lot of hotels that looked like this:


Miami seemed to be under massive construction. I swear there dozens of building going up simultaneously.


Most of Key West looked liked this: We spent the day driving the hybrid in circles.


Four rednecks that didn't speak queen's english tried to start a rumble with me and my co-worker by throwing french fried at us in this joint that sold the same things White Castle sells, but with different packaging.


We didn't pummel the local-yocals because we were there to support the Germans. I can't fully explain how much I learned that week, but it was pretty incredible to spend so many hours in a car learning about Germania. At one point, our SUV had 4 engineers, (1 driver, 3 computer jockeys) and I imagined a horrible roll-over accident that would render us all dead. Headlines: 4 nerds dead

One German was disappointed that the fans at a Tigers game weren't nearly as rowdy as his typical hometown soccer crowd. After much discussion, we decided the reason things are so lame in the U.S. is because away fans have to travel so far to support their local regional sports team, that any event will be dominated by the home team's fans. In Germania it's always a ~50/50 mix meaning you're not so much cheering for your team, as you are cheering AGAINST those bastards on the other side. This dialog makes sense in my mind.



We also spent a few nights at the bar with the Germans where i managed to pick up a few sayings. For one, as the saying goes, "while toasting, always your the person you're toasting in the eye or it's seven years bad sex." Seems logical. Another one that came out at the end of the night didn't translate as smoothly... apparently, "just one more beer is like zero more beers." Also, it would seem that free health care leads to a lot of loafers that refuse to get a job. (did i mention that moments after realizing we were 4-geeks in million dollar proto-type car that had more instrumentation than you can shake a stick at, the hood of the broke-ass honda in front of us flew up and snapped off, sailing 40 feet in the air and landing just meters from our faces? that was crazy) Oh, and i also heard a terribly lame penis joke that was only funny because it required the use of metric units. I'll only tell it in person and when drunk.

Finally, it might have something to do with the company these guys worked for, but they all considered Ferrari's to be really expensive Fiats. I took it as a massive compliment.

I apologize for the lack of wit and formatting. I had a lot of material i wanted to get down (more for myself than fr you slackers) as well as plenty of other self-expression literary works I'm trying to form in my mind... and too much material rolling around up there will make me fall down stairs.

What is all movie posters were made in the style of GrindHouse?





Finally, I'm sad to say I'm been damn too busy to send out a DVD full of BSG. My apologies.