In my quest to better understand these "humans," i've been collecting a well of data. first, i would like to show sophist blog attendance since i started crying like a 12 year old bitch with a skinned knee about my failures at life. with site hits blowing up in the past 4 days (and not even mentioning page hits) i can confidently say it's jumping off over here.
I'm thinking of finally dropping my amateur status and going pro. I suppose the alternative is you sick fuckers just really like to see me squirm and can't get enough of the human drama that is the Dudley St...
here's the fun numbers: My housemate Jon and I (Jon's idea) decided to measure the muzzle velocity of the $4 and $8 dollar air soft guns we bought at the dirt mall. (we needed to explain, scientifically, why the $8 versions were leaving holes in the blinds and dents in the walls) Using a measured distance down the main hall of the house, we set up a microphone and recorded the pop of the gun firing and also the sound of the BB ricocheting off our front door. Disregarding the time it took for the sound to travel back from the door (at just under 200 inches and 70 degrees, it was a mere 0.00203 seconds or something between 0.5% and 1% of the total BB travel time) we used the PC to measure the time the BB took to travel and merely divided it by the distance traveled. There's no pretty graphs here, but for extra credit you can produce the graphs yourself and turn them in. Here's the numbers:
Analysis: The colts (Chest and Notorious' pieces, as well) cost an amazingly low dirt mall price of $4 and produced a fairly decent shot. However, for a few more bucks, you can wreck some shit... or in Becca's case, get an obviously sub-standard mechanism. Also note, that Jon's Glock failed early in it's life, losing a few (what we thought were) useless pieces. Turns out those cracks were very detrimental to it's performance compared to a fully operational version.
Conclusion: if you piss me off, i will pummel you with 80 mph plastic death. Also, watch out for the little woman with the big gun.
3 comments:
damn, i should have formatted those last two columns a little better
I think you should determine the mass of the BB and translate its muzzle velocity into a kinetic energy (0.5*m*v^2). Then compare this value with the kinetic energy of a bullet leaving the end of a real glock (this data, of course, would have to be hunted down somewhere). Finally, you could compare the average cost per Joule of kinetic energy between the cheap-ass $8 gun and a real gun.
Maybe, in the end, you'll discover it's more economical to buy like 10 - 20 cheap ass BB launchers and place them in parallel, rather than actually buying a real gun. Of course, you'd need some sort of a device to functionally parallelize them (I'm thinking of Moe's contraption on that episode where Homer joins the NRA).
If you can carry out these calculations for me, then I'll grease the wheels with that special engineering compound we all get upon entering the fraternal brotherhood and expedite your hiring process. It may sound like a far-fetched promise, but trust me--once you're in, you're in for life and there's no limit to the strings you can pull for others. Or, at least, you get really good at making outrageous promises up front and finding some way to either miraculously fulfill them or redefine them at a later date to better reflect what you've actually accomplished.
Munky~
perhaps... but then again, i think i'll just leave all that to the imagination. basically, i've already grown tired of this experiment.
Post a Comment